Epic Metal Review, Part 2

Okay, for round two of my metal review, I am settling in with a bowl of raspberries and what's left of my box of chocolates. Mmmm... dessert and death metal. This should be delightful.

Emperor: A Fine Day To Die

This started out with a very haunting Sleepy Hollowish sound, which I was not necessarily expecting from metal. But as my friend Ryan pointed out, metal is varied, and this apparently falls under the category of "black metal." I'd be lying if I said I knew what that meant, exactly, but at the very least I now know there is such a thing. And knowing's half the battle. G-I-JOOOOE!

Once my heartbeat reset from the initial shock of the explosive sound coming in (hospitals should replace their paddles with this kind of stuff)...

[Hang on...creamy truffle break. Not in the song. In my mouth.]

...I found myself headbanging unwittingly. As I am sitting down currently, it was more of an aggressive head nod, but the point is the music made me move around. I find the general driving melody behind this song to be very enjoyable. And the drummer very obviously knows exactly which rhythm complements my desire to head bang to the guitar refrain. It didn't feel like "every other metal song" (not that I'm saying I'm an authority on what that means).

I know I know I know. "WHAAAAT? Multiple musicians on different instruments playing cohesively together? It's like they're in a band or something!" Shut up. Not all bands work as well together as this one on this song.

Also, surprisingly, the singer didn't bug me. I don't know whether I'm just becoming increasingly immune to growling and screeching, or if his was just not as offensive, but either way, I was able to stop trying to listen to the words and just try to feel the passion behind the general sound he was making. And when the guitar shredding came in around 6:45 of the song, I ended up really appreciating how similar the sound was to the singer's voice. It matched him not only in pitch, but in intensity. And that contributed to my overall "enjoyment" of this song.

Vader: Out of the Deep

Random thought: I am starting to wonder what metal would sound like if it were driven more by major chords than minor. Okay, back to this song.

I'm about to show the full extent of my dorkiness:

This song makes me think of tap dancing (consider that a dare, Devon). The fact is, if I could watch a dancer create the same exact rhythms I'm hearing on the drums in this song, I'd be in awe. So I guess that means I'm kind of in awe of the drummer, doesn't it?

At least I can understand this singer. He may be growling, but he's enunciating. That's all I'm asking for, people! I don't know if I can so much relate to the lyrics, on most days anyway. But I am thrilled to pieces that I can understand them.

The Faceless: An Autopsy

Is that a synthesizer? I feel like I'm listening to a metal song, remastered with the MIDI version of itself. This song makes me simultaneously want to rip something open with my bare hands, and play Super Mario. Especially around 2:25 of the song, I just have mental images of the band members punching blocks and garnering coins while shredding and growling in between.

And that makes me laugh, which makes me happy, which means this song is okay in my book.

Though to give a more honest "music" review, I was genuinely impressed with the speed and versatility of the guitar riffing in this song (I suppose the general theme I'm picking up is that metal guitar soloists are really talented and probably have wicked calluses).

Austrian Death Machine: Get to the Choppa

I thought this was kind of meh. I thought with the premise of mimicking Ah-nold that it'd be wittier, but it wasn't nearly as amusing as I thought it'd be. Though I'm not sure wit and Ah-nold go hand in hand anyway. Point is, this song didn't really impress me.

Lacuna Coil: Heaven's a Lie

First female vocalist I've reviewed in my metal spree thus far. And a pretty one at that. Her voice sounds a lot like Madonna's, actually. But I like her voice better than Madonna's, by a hair, I think. And even the slightly growlier male backing vocal is still melodic, which is refreshing. It wasn't my favorite song ever, but it wasn't bad.

Halestorm: Love/Hate Heartbreak

Okay, I know I said I didn't want to review them, but I couldn't help myself when it came to this song. Because I really like this song. The words got to me the very first time I heard it, even with their repetitiveness. And not only is lead singer Lzzy Hale hot, but I absolutely LOVE her voice. I want her voice. I want to give her voice roses so it knows how special it is. The way she can throw so much power behind it, and then make it so pillow soft a split second later... it's magic. If I were more of a rock singer, hers is the voice I'd aspire to match. Her and Emma Pew from Black Carl.

Astral Doors: In Rock We Trust

I feel like this is the singer people mimic when people create fake metal bands and spoof bands. The whole Ronnie James Dio thing (may he rest in peace). He's got a great tonality overall, though. And I would definitely listen to this song again, especially given how easy and fun the chorus is to sing along to.

Nocturnal Rites: Still Alive

Oh my gosh I love this guy's voice. Right off the bat. Probably a sign I've been trained by 6 years of being told to appreciate 80's hair metal, because he kind of has that quality to his voice.

Good call, Tony. I really really really like this song. I'm enjoying listening to it so much that I've kind of lost focus on reviewing it. So rather than offering some sagacity on the musicality or whatever, I will just say I simply enjoyed this song, start to finish. It's going on my list of things to buy on iTunes next time I bother to go shopping on it.

Alright, that's 8 more songs, with 8 more to go, so expect one more installment of my Epic Metal Review (probably tomorrow or the next day or the next day).